The Romance Reviews

The Romance Reviews

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Ying Yang: Weddings and Amy Winehouse

Last summer, I re-connected with a friend from elementary school. Widowed for a while, she met a man who treated her wonderfully, and she was in the early stages of planning her wedding. That wedding is now a week away. 

Tomorrow, for the first time in NYC history, the first same sex marriages will legally take place and I am sitting here listening to Amy Winehouse warbling "Moody's Mood for Love".  You must be asking yourselves: "What do the two have in common?"

Well, here's my thinking:  Weddings are joyous events.  The bride is the center of attention and she is Queen for the Day.  Weddings bring about feelings of excitement and families get together in happiness; people become reacquainted; you hear songs of love, happiness and the future.  A new beginning is on the horizon.  The future is bright!

Funerals evoke feelings of sadness, hurt, pain that emerges from the abyss of your soul.  Unbearable pain.  Families get together embraced by and in a joint sorrow.  Conversations revolve around what could have been.  The deceased -- or rather-- the life led by the deceased is analyzed and solutions to the poor soul's issues are tossed around. It is the end of an era. There is nothing but darkness.  This is what I imagine might happen at Amy's funeral, as is common.  People just can't help themselves.

But what about that person who's life is being dissected?  Amy Winehouse was a tortured soul who just wanted to be loved.  Everybody wants to be loved, right?  But who really knows what goes on in a person's life?  Amy's soulful torch songs; her showy performance style and her lifestyle hinted at a search for something.  I believe all she wanted was to be loved and accepted as she was ... a la Billie Holiday.

I think it must be similar for same sex couples.  My friend's wedding got me thinking about all the same sex committment ceremonies I'd been invited to and attended over the years.  There is only one couple among them that will not legalize their union.  They are in the minority.  I am ecstactic that New York City has risen to the occasion!  It is wonderful to know that my hometown recognizes that love is love, no matter it's presentation.  It was a long hard road; one hard travelled.

Amy Winehouse, you WERE loved honey.  You just didn't see it.  Maybe you couldn't, but I hope your soul finds some peace.



  1. Amy was and is an exquisite singer and songwriter, a rare combination. She was desperate to be loved and made extreme choices (no longer choices in the end) but her music too was extreme - in that it was genius, extraordinary and perfect.

    Apart from my OH not one other person I knew liked her or her music; it was like they thought they'd 'catch' her mania. More fool them: Amy was a rare talent who will be appreciated too late.

    As for same-sex marriages, any union between two people that truly love each other is divine.

  2. Hi Lily,

    Thanks for your comments. My daughter introduced me to Amy and I immediately fell in love with her sultry voice, her style and could relate to her torment. I was shocked when I heard of her passing simply because I believed all the reports that she was on her way to sustained recovery.

    Re: same sex unions - I am in complete agreement with you. There is so much hating going on that anytime you see two human beings loving each other should be cause for celebration!